warning: character death, angst
There are millions of pieces of paper strewn over Dean’s desk. Notes for his next book, doodles of things that popped into his brain, and scrapes that just accumulated in little piles all around. But, in one of the infinite photo frames on the desk, there is a folded piece of paper that no one will ever be able to touch.
But Dean is gone now and it’s left to his three kids to clean the loft up and get it ready for showing, so that they can sell it. So, Danielle grabs the piece of paper and unfolds it, ever curious about one of the big secrets that her father had.
It’s a note.
From her other dad.
I think I’m going to close my eyes today. I don’t think they’ll be opening again. I would say don’t cry for me, but I know you better than that. You’ll hold the tears back until no one is watching. That’s just how you’ve always been.
If you’re wondering, I don’t regret it. I don’t regret changing the entire weave of destiny, because you still turned out to be the best man I ever knew, even if you were a bit more selfish, which I fail to see as a fault right now.
Do me one favor, don’t come rushing up behind me. I know it’ll be hard, but I don’t think the kids would ever forgive us for leaving one right after another. So wait a few years, mourn for me, write a book about everything, tell the world our ridiculous story, then come. I should be able to find where Gabe is hiding the booze by then.
I’m sorry I’m going so soon. Don’t think this means that I don’t love you, cause I do. I love you so much that sometimes it’ll just hit me out of nowhere and I lose the ability to breathe because I got lucky enough to have you for this small span of time and I will never get over that.
I’m getting tired now and I think this pen is finally running out. Also, I hear you banging around in the kitchen. Cooking was never my forte, so I guess I need to thank you for not letting me starve all these years.
Je t’aimerai toujours*
Danielle sat back in her father’s chair, the note shaking in her trembling hand. She always knew that her parents had a love that no one, except maybe her Aunt Kate and Uncle Rick, could ever hope to match up to, but to hold such physical proof of it in her hands, it was like a shot to the heart in the very best of ways.
She folded the note back up and put it back in its place in the photo frame. She would clean the desk later, right now, she needed to go downstairs and hug someone before she started crying again.
*Je t’aimerai tojours = I will always love you